Archive for September, 2010

Karen answers Judy

admin on Sep 30th 2010

Comment by Judy on 20 Sep 2010 at 8:50 am

Karen,

First, you are a true spirit of survival. I have read your book three times over the last year. I have never read any other book more than once. 
The world needs to hear from you in person. I can’t stand the way you were treated as a child but have learned more about abuse in your book. Not only about D.I.D. or M.P.D. but about freedom, sexual abuse, physical abuse, mental abuse, illness, suicide, fatigue, and so much more. The entire medical world would benefit from your book.

Now, I have written Oprah about you and never received anything back in acknowledgement of your story. I can’t imagine why you have not appeared as her guest. I noticed you have answered other questions about this but I am asking again. Why hasn’t Oprah called you? Stories like yours are right up her alley. The first week of this season Oprah gives away so much in the form of things. She brought back lots of oldies which was nice but where did her heart go? I am an Oprah fan and am disappointed with her show so far this season. Have you watched it at all? Have you ever been called by Oprah? Would you appear if she called you? I would like to know why 5 out of 6 of my friends wrote to her about you and none of us ever received a note back. Has she read your book? Sorry about all of this. I am not trying to disturb your peace but needed to say if that’s how Oprah is I lost 50% of the respect I once had for her. 
I am praying you are well. I hope you write another book with or without the doctor. I pray you keep your chin up during your life. You have nothing to be ashamed of. YOU are one of God’s miracles.

God bless you my friend,

Judy

Des Plaines, IL

Dear Judy,

Thank you for all your support and compliments! I am in awe that you have read my story three times! I am well aware of the voice within me that tells me to share more. I’ve decided to write the sequel in hope to someday publish it to accompany “Switching Time.” Thank you for having faith in my story. It would be nice if my story was acknowledged by medical schools and all professionals who come into contact with someone, like me, who has survived trauma from child abuse.

I thought Oprah would be encouraged by my story, too!  The Oprah Show has contacted Dr. Baer and me numerous times, but in the end chose another multiple from the UK with twenty active alters to guest along with the daughter of Trudy Chase, author of When Rabbit Howls.  Trudy Chase, sadly, has passed on. That show will be aired during Oprah’s last season. I may not understand Oprah’s reason, but I suspect her decision was based on what she thinks is best for her show. I do not take her rejection as a personal attack. I love Oprah and all that she has done for so many people. As a matter of fact, I often thought it would be nice to travel to Africa and talk with the girls in her school about the signs to watch for to protect themselves, about integrity, dignity, and self-respect.

I have long admired Oprah and feel sad that I won’t get to meet her. My alters and I consistently were inspired by her show. I believe I (we), have grown along with Oprah. I also kept a Grateful Journal. I would love to sit down and talk with Oprah, even if only face-to-face and not necessarily as a guest on her show. I am far from being disappointed and hope the multiple chosen with active alters will not be influenced or harmed by the exposure of live television. I, myself, could not have appeared during my treatment of multiplicity. I believe there would have been alter chaos, which could have harm the progress I was making at that time.

I’m not sure what to say about you not receiving a response from Oprah’s staff or from her. I assume there is simply too much mail and it may have been lost or left unread. I can’t imagine any other reason that so many have written without a response back. I have known many who sent letters to her, too. No one that I know ever received a response from her either.

If The Oprah staff would call me again, I would consider being Oprah’s guest. It has always been in my heart to encourage hope through sharing my story.

Thank you for your blessings. God bless you!

Karen

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Karen answers Merideth

admin on Sep 30th 2010

Comment by Merideth on 16 Sep 2010 at 3:35 am

I am so happy to connect with you. Your story made a life change difference for the better in me. I was afraid of everything. I thought everyone could see that I was abused. But after reading your story and posts I can see clearly that it is possible to heal after the trauma. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing your story with us little people. I have grown because I know there are people like you who care enough to share the pain I kept hidden.

God Bless You.

Merideth

Dear Merideth,

You’re welcome! Thank you for sharing. I understand being afraid of everything. That comes when one doesn’t feel secure. I believe each of us has the ability to heal if we want to. It’s no doubt hard work, but possible. In sharing with each other we learn from each other about what is possible. I feared sharing at one time, too. It takes time to build trust and share. I am glad that you chose to share with me. That’s a great step towards feeling free from the burden of your past. Though past pain can’t be seen like outside bruises, it can be seen in the way one carries oneself when one’s confidence and self esteem have taken a blow. Sadness can be seen. Please take care of yourself.

God bless you!

Karen

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Karen answers Sam

admin on Sep 30th 2010

Comment by Sam on 15 Sep 2010 at 5:54 pm

Hello Karen,

Greetings from far and beyond. I loved your book. I am fascinated in your ability to share you story AND care about so many people. Love your spirit. Congrats to Dr. Baer and you, Karen!

Sam

Dear Sam,

Thank you so much for your greetings and compliments! Dr. Baer and I truly appreciate hearing from you!

Wishing you all my best!

Karen

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Karen answers Kadee

admin on Sep 30th 2010

Comment by Kadee on 15 Sep 2010 at 6:39 am

Hi Karen,

I have read “A Life in Pieces” now, many times. I find the survival mechanism that you created to be fascinating and amazing! I can’t even begin to imagine the horrors that you must have been through – but I want to thank you for surviving, not only surviving but using your story to encourage others. You are a courageous and strong person! 
I don’t want my words to sound flaky or hollow, but just know “You are wonderful!”

Hugs sent your way,

Kate

Dear Kadee,

You’re welcome. Thank you for all your kind thoughts and compliments! What a nice way to start my day! I don’t know what to say. I am speechless…

Please know that I truly appreciate hearing from you. Your words do not sound flaky or hollow. I love hearing them! I am sending a ‘hug” back to you!

It is my desire to encourage hope through sharing my story. I hope to continue on doing so for a very long time.

Wishing you all my best!

Karen

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Karen answers Lenny

admin on Sep 30th 2010

Comment by Lenny on 13 Sep 2010 at 3:54 pm

Hello Karen.
I aaaaaaaam innnnnnnnnn awwwwwwwww of your story! Unbelievably amazing and beautifully written. Thank you for bringing hope to a dying illness. Who ever thought multiple personality disorder to not be real must read your story!!!!!!!!!! Well organized throughout. I have learned so much.

Thank you, Mam!

Lenny

Dear Lenny,

Love your enthusiasm! Thank you!  We have just begun to explore all that has been misunderstood about multiplicity in previous years. That’s why Dr. Baer and I shared my story. It is time to re-think the facts regarding D.I.D./M.P.D. It’s time to learn more so that better treatment becomes available. Knowledge is strength.

It is my hope that all who work in the medical field will read my story and ask a million questions. It’s the best way to gain insight on a once incomprehensible illness.

Thank you for sharing and for your compliments!

Karen

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Karen answers Betsy

admin on Sep 30th 2010

Comment by Betsy on 14 Sep 2010 at 5:01 pm

I just wanted to thank you for your courage and extraordinary candor in telling your story! At our book club discussion, your story held everyone in rapt attention and generated incessant questions, we were completely mesmerized by your story. Thank you so much for your time and energy, Karen. We can’t wait to read the next book! All the best, inbetween!

Betsy

Dear Betsy,

You’re welcome! Thank you for sharing and for all for your kind thoughts and compliments! It’s a pleasure to hear that my story held everyone’s attention. That gives me hope to continue moving forward encouraging hope. I am touched by all.

Sending you and your book club all my best! It is my hope to share my sequel with all of you soon.

Karen

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Karen answers Jen

admin on Sep 30th 2010

Comment by Jen on 13 Sep 2010 at 8:54 pm

I just stumbled onto this site. I was diagnosed as Bipolar I almost one year ago. I am a working professional, have a house, and a 3yr old daughter. I have recently become interested in meditation and building a meditation practice for the purpose of becoming more “aware” and to allow some positive affect to enter into my life. As my meditation deepened, I became filled with sadness and rage and have become bombarded with fragmented memories of my childhood. My therapist and I worked through the DES and I scored fairly high, I guess. Now I have become aware of my dissociative experiences during therapy and throughout my day. I have become extremely distraught as I have also become aware of my limited memory for childhood experiences. I have complete blackouts (under the influence of small amounts of alcohol only) for several hours at a time, almost always when sexual advances are involved. Very recently, in a hypnosis session, my therapist approached the 5yr old part of myself and my father appeared and spoke to my therapist. He told her to leave “5″ alone, among other things that I cannot recall. The “introject” has been locked in a room ever since and my therapist wants to speak to him soon, stating she cannot leave someone locked up like that. I do not know what is happening to me and I am very scared to let this introject out of the room. I am trying to ignore the voices I hear daily, telling myself I am making all of this up. I don’t understand why this has suddenly happened. My life feels completely out of control now and I am a very control-oriented person. I do not want to discuss any of this with my psychiatrist as she has my diagnosis firmly cemented as bipolar. I have what I guess I would call “rapid cycling,” but I become so enraged sometimes that I am afraid of what I may do. I have read extensively about dissociative identity disorder, including half of “Switching Time” (which I had to put down). As I understand it, an alter will simply communicate when they are ready and the “host” will likely be amnesiac for the event…I know I have several people living inside me, but am not able to accept a diagnosis of dissociative identity disorder because the lack of control scares me to death! Your story saddened me to the deepest levels and I think you are such a strong, creative person. Did you have any reservations in accepting your diagnosis once presented?

Dear Jen,

I know it’s hard to hear your diagnosis. It was for me, too. But I never asked what was wrong with me and it was a few years into therapy when I gained enough courage to come out and ask Dr. Baer. I always knew something was very different and troubling about my losing time, but I’d never heard too much on M.P.D. I did know that I shied away from movies like Sybil. I couldn’t understand why until near the end of my therapy.

Please don’t be so hard on yourself. If you have doubts about your diagnosis, seek a second opinion. It’s very difficult to find the right therapist to accompany you on your journey. In the beginning it was difficult for me to trust anyone with my thoughts and memories, including Dr. Baer. I believed I would be hurt, not believed, but locked up or worse. It takes time to heal. Know your limitations and set your therapy at your speed, not your therapist’s idea of what is right for you. Therapists can be wrong, too, they are only human.

I am not a therapist and can’t give advice, but I believe if your therapist is trying to persuade an alter about something before trust and rapport is established, that can cause alter chaos. Sometimes doctors are quick to diagnose. My symptoms, my alters, took time to reveal themselves.

I appreciate you sharing that you have only read the first half of my story. I can imagine how hard it is for you to read a book that triggers up many feelings and memories of your own abuse. But stopping midpoint can cause more stress. I would like to encourage you to finish reading my story for closure. The first half of the book is a hard read but the second half will provide you with a sense of calm knowing there is hope of healing. I believe the end, my survival, is the best part of the book. Please write back if you should finish reading and have questions.

Trust your instinct. Wishing you all my best for a healthy and successful therapeutic journey.

Karen

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Karen answers Colin

admin on Sep 30th 2010

Comment by Colin on 12 Sep 2010 at 10:21 pm

I am a med student fascinated in your recovery. I have studied many aspects of the mind and found yours most bizarre. Have you ever thought of challenging the doctors who falsely diagnose their patients as DID or MPD. I believe you have the ability to share at a much higher level then this blog. I found more details in your story than the required books in class. Keep writing forward. Thank you.

Colin, future Therapist

Dear Colin,

Good luck on your studies! D.I.D. and M.P.D. are the same according to the medical books, but I prefer to use the term “multiple.” Multiplicity is misconstrued on many levels and there is a definite need to understand all that causes someone like me to split, fragment, and compartmentalize their mind in order to survive. Multiplicity is a real illness. Dr. Baer has done his best to share his experience in treating me hoping to bring forward knowledge about this incredible illness.

It’s not my job to challenge doctors who mistakenly diagnose their patients, but I’m willing to continue to share my experiences so that doctors, teachers, and all those working with true multiple patients can open their eyes and see beyond what is normal. Yes, multiplicity is bizarre and can be unbelievable. But how can anyone understand or treat the illness if no documentation is provided? Dr. Baer has my complete file, from start to finish. I believe my case study is the only one to hold such value.

Thank you for your compliments and sharing.

Karen

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Karen answers Cathy

admin on Sep 30th 2010

Comment by Cathy on 12 Sep 2010 at 1:26 pm

Karen,

I am very grateful for your inspiration and help to people like me who lost faith and are determined to find a happy medium. I was abused to and was diagnosed with D.I.D. two years ago. I don’t have alters that I am aware of but all the documentaries I watched there is not one single person who survived to become one blended person without alters. I wish there was a program that showed survival not dysfunction. Why is it that you were not the focus of a documentary? I would like to see something more positive, hopeful and promising and you ARE the one to bring optimism and fact to help others live. I will be praying for you.

Please write your memoir.

Cathy, in Alaska

Dear Cathy,

I hear you. Dr. Baer and I understand the need for a documentary on someone who has healed from D.I.D.  My story, Switching Time, was written with that in mind.

Surviving multiplicity was difficult. But my alters did not disappear. My alters are me and I am my alters. We became one. No one alter died, they just simply merged within me to complete me. But I was fortunate to receive great care. I could not have survived alone.

Thank you so much in your compliments, support, encouragement, and for having faith in me. I am touched. Please know that I continue to write everyday and hope to some day share with everyone a sequel to Switching Time.

Wishing you all my best.

Karen

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Karen answers Marciana

admin on Sep 27th 2010

Comment by Marciana on 12 Aug 2010 at 6:57 am

Seems like you had a awfully intense life but turned all around to help people. I felt angry, sad, happy, and inspired by your story. What a great life lesson at a time when no one seems to care. I mean really care.

Thank you.

Marciana

Dear Marciana,

Thank you for sharing! I understand all that you have felt reading my story. I feel the same way, too. And it’s my story. I believe we can learn from each other. I was lucky to have survived with unconditional care and support from Dr. Baer. During my healing I rarely spoke to anyone. This is my time to help those who need a bit of support from someone other than their therapist.

I am glad to be here, enjoy helping others, and am fortunate to be in a position to help those who are hurting or know of someone who is hurting. I believe it is my purpose, and God willing I will continue to encourage hope forever… Why? Because I care.

Wishing you all my best.

Karen

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