Karen answers Alec’s Second Comment

admin on Apr 28th 2009

Comment by Alec on 28 Apr 2009 at 10:47 am

Dear karen,

First thank you for your support BEFORE my first appointment with my therapist. I might not have gone if you didn’t get back with me. I read over your answer a hundred times and felt if you thought I was brave than maybe even if you didn’t meet me I was braver than I thought of myself. You were right about therapy being hard work. My therapist seemed distant but since you explained your feelings I knew I was the one that being distant. He was listening. I took a time out after my session. I felt ill but releaved. I was exhausted too. Did you feel creepy after sharing things. We didn’t go into detail and like you said he asked questions. My second appointment is tomorrow. I am starting to build up some fear again.. I know you might not get to answer me before tomorrow so don’t worry I will be okay thanks to you for giving me a glimpse into the fear you had to. I won’t miss my appointment. I feel better just knowing you are helping regular people like me.

Thank you ten fold. I am on my way.

Alec

Dear Alec,

Congratulations! You did it! The first step towards your journey toward healing. The hardest day is the first day. It was for me too.  I am glad to hear that all went well and that you took some time for yourself.  I truly appreciate you reading my answer over and over again, but please remember I’m not a professional therapist and can only share from my own personal experiences.

I am not sure whether you will be able to read my answer before your next appointment, but please know that it can feel creepy sharing the intimate details of what may be troubling you.  Time and again I felt ill, dirty, and foolish for telling what happened to me.  I felt like dying, but I knew I needed professional help.  Just like you, I was ready and knew it was time to seek help for myself.

In the beginning I worried Dr. Baer might judge me, become disgusted with me, not believe me, or worse, stop listening to me altogether.  I feared sharing the horror I sufffered.  I had never shared this with anyone before Dr. Baer.  I kept all within, and my pain continued to fester until I spoke the truth.  Although I felt ashamed, Dr. Baer stayed the same.  And believe me, as a highly attuned person, I could sense he represented good and wouldn’t harm me.

As time went on I felt my confidence build and I couldn’t hold back.  Once the emotional gate came open there was no turning back.  One day at a time, one session at a time, slow and steady, steady and slow, I began to heal.

Wishing you all my best.

Karen

Filed in Karen's Answers | No responses yet

Trackback URI | Comments RSS

Leave a comment