Comment by Jessi on 08 Jun 2010 at 2:24 pm
Dear Karen,
When you feel like drowning what do you do? When you feel lost what helps you find your way? I feel like I’m drowning and lost. If I were to do anything to help myself what is it I could do? If you are lonely, lost, hurting and betrayed how could I allow someone I trusted to get in the way? How can I overcome it? My therapist betrayed my trust. He asked me to do something inappropriate to him thinking I was under hypnosis but I wasn’t. I was faking. I don’t want to go into details here but can you ask Dr. Baer the right measures to take. Should I report him? Let it go? Find another therapist? I didn’t tell him I know what he asked and enjoyed on my behalf. I feel like drowning because I did what he asked while pretending to be hypnotized. I respect your decision and if you cant answer that’s okay. I don’t know how to handle this. Is it abuse or not? I’m confused and feel all alone.
Jessi
Dear Jessi,
I hear you. Yes, what you have experienced is abuse. And yes, your therapist should be reported. I understand the pain that comes when someone you trust and confided in hurts you. I’ve been there, too, not with my therapist, but with others I assumed I could trust.
I’m sorry your therapist betrayed you. I would feel devastated, too. I asked Dr. Baer what actions you could take and he said you could report him to the Ethics Committee if he belongs to a professional organization (psychologist, psychiatrist?) or sue him for malpractice. You can notify the Ethics Committee by calling the general number for the professional organization.
Please know that if your therapist asked you to perform lewd or inappropriate acts while assuming you were under hypnosis, that is a crime. And your therapist knows it. I’m not sure of your reason to not tell him you were faking while being under hypnosis. But that doesn’t matter at this point. You can’t continue therapy with him.
You’ll need to work out what’s happened to you with a new therapist. Abuse is abuse. Please seek another therapist as soon as possible. Share with your new therapist what you have shared with me and maybe together you can find the right way to handle this abuse.
Know that you have done nothing wrong. Your therapist betrayed not only your trust, but also caused damage to your overall well being.
Please take time to heal and seek qualified help. I will be here for you if you need to write me again.
Karen