{"id":2606,"date":"2011-02-13T21:03:09","date_gmt":"2011-02-14T02:03:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/?p=2606"},"modified":"2011-02-13T21:03:09","modified_gmt":"2011-02-14T02:03:09","slug":"karen-answers-kelly-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/?p=2606","title":{"rendered":"Karen answers Kelly"},"content":{"rendered":"<blockquote><p><em>Comment by Kelly Hendrix\u00a0on 16 Dec 2010 at 11:34 am<\/em><\/p>\n<p>I am the wife of a lovely man who has suffered similar to you, but differently in that he was gang raped by his step-father and his cop friend&#8230;.we are living in hell&#8230;he kept his shame a secret until this year\u2026so for 22 years\u2026he lived alone with the chaos in his mind. I am reading the book about your life now and I am crying for you and my husband daily. Your courage will give me hope to see John thru to our end\u2026and hopefully integrating.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>Dear Kelly,<\/p>\n<p>Thank you for writing! I&#8217;m glad that your husband shared his pain with you. It&#8217;s not easy to share the abuse suffered in one&#8217;s past, but be assured that once your husband accepts his being abused, the weight of the emotional burden he&#8217;s held inside by keeping his horrific secret becomes less to carry. It takes time to heal.<\/p>\n<p>I am glad for the therapy I received. My alters caused too much chaos for me. Of course, my alters were a God sent coping mechanism for me as a child. I know my alters always served my best interests helping me to survive. But as an adult I needed them less. I never really lost my alters; I am my alters and my alters are me.\u00a0Integration gave me peace.<\/p>\n<p>I never imagined I would feel acceptance, respect, support, and encouragement during the process of telling all, but I did. There is a sense of calm in being free of the bind of lies that once held me prisoner within myself. By sharing, seeking help, and healing, I am in control. If I had not shared and acknowledged my abuse, I would have allowed my abusers to control me from the grave. Being a survivor means releasing, letting go, gaining knowledge from what happened, and moving forward by helping yourself and others.<\/p>\n<p>I have a bad day now and then, but at least I know where my dark thoughts come from. My dark thoughts belong in my past and are no longer welcome in my present or my future.<\/p>\n<p>Best of luck to you!<\/p>\n<p>Karen<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Comment by Kelly Hendrix\u00a0on 16 Dec 2010 at 11:34 am I am the wife of a lovely man who has suffered similar to you, but differently in that he was gang raped by his step-father and his cop friend&#8230;.we are living in hell&#8230;he kept his shame a secret until this year\u2026so for 22 years\u2026he lived [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2606","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-karens-answers"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2606","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2606"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2606\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2607,"href":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2606\/revisions\/2607"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2606"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2606"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.switchingtime.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2606"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}