Comment by Adam on 29 Nov 2011 at 9:50 pm

Dear Karen,

Contrary to disbelief I don’t believe in anyone with many different people parts living together in one body. Not possible and not in the bible. Did you know doctors laugh when someone claims to dissociate. I bet you Dr. Baer laughed every day he treated you. I bet you were his entertainment and the reason he kept treating you. Face it. Most therapists are bored to death listening to dysfunctional people BUT you, my God, are the most interesting prize for a frustrated pent up unemotionally charged, narcissistic therapist. I have to say you must of made Dr. Baers work a joy and challenge. Like Frankenstein. The Mind. The Phantom Hand. However, no matter what I think you are the kindest writer and caring woman who has answered people with heartfelt love. I like you. But can’t get your illness. Are you sure Dr. Baer didn’t force these alters on your during hypnosis.

Adam, Utah

Dear Adam,

You want to know something, in the beginning I actually thought the same thing? There is no one like me in the Bible, but truly I am one of God’s children, and therefore I’m real, just like you. God created each of us to be unique and to serve His purpose. I am no different than anyone else except for the fact that my mind created an amazing coping mechanism for me to survive horrific abuse.

I’m sure some doctors would laugh when faced with treating a multiple patient.  There are many bizarre and interesting moments that are priceless in the way a multiple, like me, lived day in and day out. Laughter and humor have healing powers, and Dr. Baer and I shared some funny moments during my therapy years.  Again, if you can’t laugh at yourself and laugh with a trusted person then how can you heal?

I laughed to myself hearing your description of how you see therapists.   Realistically, therapists are doing a job and to the best of their ability.  They need to be an attuned listener, without judgment or interference, for their patient to share their thoughts and feelings. And yes, I believe it was a joy, annoying, and a challenge for Dr. Baer to treat me. But together, as a team, we worked hard to help me heal. We shared many endearing moments to build trust and mutual respect.

I’m glad to say Dr. Baer never once forced my alters to do anything they didn’t want to.

Thank you so much for your kind compliments and challenging questions. I hope my answers help you understand the therapy process.

Wishing you all my best,

Karen

Comment by Sylvia from Japan on 28 Nov 2011 at 11:18 am

Hello Karen,

We are in despair in Japan. I am a student and read your book. I have a new strength in knowing you. Thank you for teaching faith in your story. Faith transforms in different ways. No compare. Just know more about hope.

Dear Sylvia,

I’m sorry to hear that you are in despair in Japan. I’ll keep you in my prayers. I’m also glad to hear that you have the strength you need to help you move forward in hope. That means a lot to me and it’s a blessing to hear that you believe my story is teaching faith. That is what I’ve hoped for.

Wishing you all my best and I hope that your faith will bring you through.

Wishing you all my best!

Karen

Comment by Freddie on 27 Nov 2011 at 6:54 pm

Hey Karen,

Class came alive with your book. Discussions had me thinking… what if you could master switching and do all the things you ever wanted to do? What would it be like to discipline your alters in a way that benefits your life instead of traumatize? If you refused integration where do you think you’d be today on a scale of one to ten in wholeness? Fascinating mind you have been given by God. How are you using your abilities today? Good luck to you.

Freddie

Dear Freddie,

It’s interesting to me to hear that a class comes alive when my story is shared. I would love to be a fly on the wall in such a classroom! Your question poses fascinating thoughts… master switching? I would have to say switching couldn’t be mastered to work in perfect sync because most alternate personalities are unique and unpredictable. It would not work for a multiple to assume they could accomplish everything on their own through their alters. Alters lack structure, organization and discipline. No benefits would occur if they were kept in their fragmented state. It’s best to work towards integration.

I’m not sure what would become of me if I had refused integration? Regarding your scale I’d probably be a 3. But what would be the point of living in constant chaos with strong alternate selves stealing my days to live out their own? I see no benefit of staying in that multiple mindset. If I didn’t integrate, I believe I wouldn’t be here. I think I’d be dead. Alters in an adult are not healthy or functional.  Alters are created during childhood to protect and are no longer needed when a multiple becomes an adult.

I have been blessed by God and use all that God has given to me to be my best one self. Thank you for asking and for wishing me luck!

Karen!

Comment by Nancilee on 23 Nov 2011 at 11:41 am

Hi Karen,

My psychology class is reading your book and I looked you up and found this site. I am really impressed with your survival and hope you are still doing well. I read some of your answers here and some of my questions were answered. I would like to know what you are thankful for…love you so much. And I am thankful for your courage to share. I am also thankful for your Doctor Baer for being your constant voice during your healing time. Happy Thanksgiving! Karen and Richard.

Dear Nancilee,

Thank you for your Thanksgiving wishes! I know this answer is posting late and I am glad that you wrote to me on Facebook before this was posted. Once again, thank you so much for your kind thoughts, compliments, and for reading my blog.

I’m thankful for life, for receiving another chance to live, for Dr. Baer, and my wonderfully large group of supportive forever group of friends. I’m blessed.

Thank you for loving me. And thank you for your kindness towards Dr. Baer. He most certainly was my voice when I could not speak. I will share your comments with him; he’ll be glad to receive it!

Happy Thanksgiving,

Karen

Comment by Kenndra on 22 Nov 2011 at 12:15 am

Hi, I heard about your book in my psychology class just last week and i cannot wait to buy it. first off i respect you and look up to and its astonishing and unbelieveable how powerful you are spiritually i admire your courage. being only 19 years old and having issues of my own my question is this, how do you live a normal life after you have gone through these experiences, thank you. – kenndra

Dear Kenndra,

Thank you for your kind thoughts and compliments! What is a normal life? I’m not sure any of us lives a normal life, but if you mean a life without abuse, then I would say that I no longer accept abuse into my life. For me, living as my best self, keeping toxic relationships at a distance, and learning to enjoy the present moment is how I make it through each day. I no longer dwell on my past and do my best to live my life to the fullest.

Thank you for asking,

Karen

Comment by Karla on 21 Nov 2011 at 1:58 am

In all your travels with the book where would you have liked to visit? What country? I really am inspired by you.  Thank you.

Dear Karla,

I would love to visit every country that has published my story. But one place would most certainly be Australia.  I’ve made many friends around the world and treasure all those who write to me. If I could, I’d love to meet them all.

Thank you for believing I’m an inspiration! That’s very kind and I accept your compliment.

Wishing you a wonderful day!

Karen

Comment by Connor on 15 Nov 2011 at 6:38 am

I just want to say that I find the book to be absolutely mind bending. I was stunned at the cruelty to which you were exposed. I am pleased you were able to heal over time. I have, along with a few friends have been endlessly discussing your story. We just need to ask (I haven’t finished Baer’s novel yet) if you are living life to the fullest. I hope you have been able to embrace the positives of life and if you have been able to shed the skin of your childhood and middle years. You see I would just be happy to know that it is possible to be able to ‘move on’ as it were. Do you still switch?  I know it is probably in the novel but unfortunately I am rather busy so I have to read it in small dosages, and if you still feel the presence of the other facets of you.

Dear Connor,

Thank you for sharing! I have to agree that my story is mind-bending; it was for me, too! I believe Dr. Baer did an amazing job.  He included enough facts so that anyone who reads it, including me, can understand what it was like to not only treat me, but to deal with so much coming from one patient.

Though it has taken me many years to heal, I consider myself on a lifetime journey to heal to improve my life and allow me to fully live my life. I am living as my best self and though I have much more to learn, rediscover, and experience, I welcome all new challenges with confidence. Emotional triggers come and go, but I’m now my best self and have found the ability to be happy, feel loved, and love life.

I no longer switch, because there is no need to. I deal with all life issues on my own without alter interference. I believe my alters are me and I am now my alters. I can’t tell whether my thoughts come from them or me. We are one woman with a healthy variety of interests.

Thank you for your questions! I would like to hear your thoughts when you finish reading!

Wishing you all my best!

Karen

Comment by Terrell on 09 Nov 2011 at 2:03 pm

What makes you different than most? What have you accepted about yourself knowing what you learned about yourself, your past? Are you at peace with yourself?

Dear Terrell,

First of all, Yes, I am at peace with myself. I do not consider myself different than any other survivor from child abuse. Why? Because abuse is abuse and we each deal with it differently. Though unique in many ways, I am no more unique than anyone else except for the fact that I had alternate personalities dividing my memories of past abuse in order to help me survive. Having dissociative identity disorder was simply the way I dealt with my abuse. It was my coping mechanism. I acknowledged my past abuse and know it was not my fault. I was a victim, a child who happened to be abused.

Thank you for asking these important questions that led to changing my life.

Karen

Comment by CR Friend on 08 Nov 2011 at 3:44 am

Karen,

Thank you for trusting me with your story. As I recover from sexual addiction it was important for me to understand what my past actions caused. Your story gave me a wake up call and I am grateful to know you. I can’t change my past but know what amends I need to make. I am inspired by your healing and generous spirit. God bless you on your growth.

CR Friend in Texas

“Happy are those whose greatest desire is to do what God requires” (Matthew 5:6)

“Happy are the pure in heart” (Matthew 5:8)

Dear CR Friend,

You’re welcome! Thank you for respecting my privacy. I am glad my story helped you uncover some of your mixed thoughts and set you in the right direction toward healing. I’m not a therapist and can’t give advice, but in my opinion you are on the right path moving forward on your own personal journey to wellness. We all need to make amends and forgive ourselves as well as others. I believe wisdom comes from knowledge gained in His name. I keep you and all my Celebrate Recovery (CR) friends in my prayers.

I thank you for sharing and for your compliments and caring for my spiritual growth.  I pray for your own healing and for all those who share in CR.

Wishing you all my best!

Karen

Comment by Lujea on 08 Nov 2011 at 3:22 am

What kinda of medication do you take now after integration for depression and stress?

Dear Lujea,

I do not take any medication since integration. If medication is needed it would probably be for something physical. If I should some day feel depressed or stressed, knowing me, I wouldn’t take any medication for it. I would seek out a therapist to talk over any issues.

Thank you for your question,

Karen