Comment by A Male Therapist on December 26, 2008 1:54 pm

Karen,

Thank you. As a therapist, who happens to be a male, it was enlightening to read your answer. As a therapist. male or female. it is not our intent to display arrogance or appear that way. Therapist’s are trained to listen to their patients and not bring their true selves into the therapy. When a patient decides on therapy it’s because they need help, and it’s our job to provide this help. I read Switching Time. I respect Dr. Richard Baer for the consistency he provided during your treatment. As for you, Karen, I am one male therapist who has learned from reading your story the depth of pain suffered from abuse. I had my doubts about MPD and have gained respect for Dr. Baer and his work. I haven’t provided care to a patient with this illness as of date, but if I ever should, I will provide better care because of reading Switching Time. I am interested in learning more.

Dear Therapist,

Thank you for your comments! I’m glad my answer provided a better understanding of how therapy worked for me.  Dr. Baer was an excellent therapist who not only provided consistency, but also provided me with the unconditional care I needed to feel safe and secure. It wasn’t easy for me to trust anyone, yet alone to share my painful past with Dr. Baer.

Thank you for respecting Dr. Baer’s work as a psychiatrist.  The illness I suffered is an unbelievable one, but it is my hope that in sharing our story, therapists and their patients will be able to work together towards healing.  Treating a patient like me can be a time consuming process, but in the end, seeing your patient become whole is a once in a life time experience.  I believe Dr. Baer was proud of his work with me.

Although you haven’t treated a patient with MPD to date, I am glad to hear that through reading Switching Time you’ve gained a better understanding of how it can be done.

Karen

Comment by Someone Wishing Merry Christmas! on December 25, 2008 5:28 am

Merry Christmas, Karen and Richard!

I read Switching Time and became fascinated with all of your accomplishments. How the both of you managed all that you had simply is unheard of. People really don’t care for that length of time.

I wish you both a safe and happy holiday season. Karen, do you believe in Santa Claus? I had to ask for you seem to be the kind of person that survived on belief in the greater good of people. What makes you different will determine you future success.

Merry Christmas, to you and yours, from Karen and Dr. Baer!

Thank you for thinking of us on this special day, we truly appreciate your kind wishes.

I know how hard it is to imagine how I sustained my relationship with Dr. Baer after so much trauma during my therapy.  I am very grateful that Dr. Baer continued to treat me after I caused him so much grief.  I’ve been blessed.

And, yes, I believe in the spirit of Christmas, and this also includes the idea of Santa Claus bringing good cheer and happiness. To me, Santa Claus lives within each of us, especially as we give gifts to those we love and care for.

Wishing you all the best during this holiday season.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Karen

Comment by LNM on December 21, 2008 3:22 pm

Dear Karen Overhill,

I read Switching Time twice for a complete understanding. It was interesting. But thereʼs something missing. How would you describe your life not mentioned in the book? I guess most personal family times is not known due to confidentiality but how was it like living the part of your life not written? Why didn’t you write more about regular life, the day to day experiences as a MPD person. I think if you included more about life outside the box of therapy Switching Time would be a bestseller.

Has anyone welcome you to the real world. I am right now.

Thank you, LNM

Dear LNM,

Thank you for reading Switching Time twice to receive a better understanding of MPD.  In writing this book, Dr. Baer accumulated so much information that it would’ve been impossible to write it all in one book.  Dr. Baer chose what he felt would best describe the pain and suffering I endured that created alternate personalities.  Dr. Baer knew from his experience what should be written to accurately tell our story.  I couldn’t have done this.

Of course, there was more to my life than what was written in Switching Time, however, that would be another entire book to write. We didn’t bring too much of my personal life outside of therapy into our book because we decided it would be too much to read and would distract from what we were hoping to accomplish.  In one way, answering questions here gives readers a chance to ask me the personal questions they would like to ask.  I’ll answer them the best way I can.

Karen

Comment by Winston on December 21, 2008 2:31 am

Hey Karen, Where are you? Iʼm Concerned. Why not active? Are you sick? Whatʼs it like to feel since you shared your painful life with the world? Waiting because I look forward to reading what you have to say. Bye.

Winston

Dear Winston,

Are you wondering why I’m a little behind in answering questions?  I’m sorry, just been a bit busy with my day job. I’m not sick, but thank you for your concern. I really appreciate you caring about me.

I don’t mind sharing my painful past as long as it sheds light on multiplicity.  I love to write and answering questions is therapeutic, not stressful.  Ask away, and I will continue to answer as quickly as possible.

Thank you for looking forward to reading what I have to say. You’ve made my day!

Karen

Comment by Cassie on December 18, 2008 4:28 am

Hi Karen,

Despite integration what was the hardest part of therapy?  I cant stand my

therapist, he makes me ill, he thinks he?s the most handsome man on earth..

I’ve had three previous male therapists, all think they are great, why are

most male therapists so stuck up?  How did you get past the attitude?  I know

there had to be an attitude with Dr. Baer because he shows it in the book.  I

feel sorry for what you had to deal with.

Cassie

Dear Cassie,

For me, the hardest part of therapy was sharing my pain. I never wanted to tell what happened to me. During the first few years of therapy I had the fear that at any moment Dr. Baer would become disgusted with me and tell me to leave.  I worried I was too much for anyone. I had never shared my past before and believed no one could handle hearing about it. I believed no one else should hurt because of my pain, especially Dr. Baer, who listened time and again to the details as I shared them in therapy.  It’s because of this fear that it took me years before I built trust and knew Dr. Baer wasn’t going to give up on me.

I can understand you picking up on the arrogance of your male therapists. I, too, felt this way about Dr. Baer early in therapy. Although my feelings may very well have come from the anger I felt towards the men who once abused me and not Dr. Baer.  I believe this is called transference. I don’t believe Dr. Baer was stuck up but I do believe he exuded confidence, and it’s because he appeared secure and stable that I chose him to accompany me on my journey. Dr. Baer is a handsome man, but it was his confidence that made him handsome to me and not particularly his looks.  I believe it’s what’s within you that defines your appearance.

As far as getting over Dr. Baer’s attitude, there’s nothing to get over.  He is who he is, and he has been there for me through thick and thin.  When I didn’t want to live, he unconditionally cared for me when no one else could. Dr. Baer is my mentor, my confidant, my trusted friend, and we share a special bond.

There’s no need to feel sorry for me, I had the most amazing luck in finding the right therapist. I surely would’ve given up long ago if it weren’t for Dr. Baer’s help. I hope you find a way to have success with your therapist.

Thank you for your questions,

Karen

Comment by Karyl on December 15, 2008 4:28 pm

This story, your story, has shocked me. I found reading Switching Time a rude awakening to child sexual abuse in the center of families who appear normal but aren’t. This book was extraordinary and took me on a journey of realistic unimaginable proportions. Great accomplishment! All should read this book, especially psych students, professors and doctors.

Dear Karyl,

I understand Switching Time has shocked you, but writing my story this way was necessary to help bring awareness and understanding to the much misunderstood and incomprehensible illness, multiple personality disorder.  In sharing my story, I prayed that those who chose to read it would understand the truth.  I know it’s a rude awakening to see a description of child sexual abuse and what can happen to children when they are left unprotected. That is what I had hoped each reader would be left with. We all need to pay more attention to all our children.

Thank you for your compliments and for understanding the reality of how children who are sexually abused can suffer, and one way in which one child, me, tried to survive in the best way she could. I believe I’ve been fortunate to be able to dissociate my horror until old enough to deal with it in a safe therapeutic setting with Dr. Baer.

Dr. Baer and I hope Switching Time will be taken seriously and that students, doctors, and therapists will find it to be of great help in the way they treat their future patients.

Karen

Comment by Sable on December 15, 2008 5:52 pm

Good morning, Karen and Richard, Best of wishes to your success and completion of Switching Time. I would like to know if you are working together on a sequel? Thank you both for contributing to medical science. I never believed any story read on dissociative disorders before Switching Time. It was written so anyone can feel what itʼs like to be a patient and how the doctor can feel when treatment is difficult. My question for Karen: How difficult was it to have your life documented? My two questions for Richard: What was the reason you decided such a story should be told? Writing the book must have exhausted both of you, who is taking care of Karen now that you are not her therapist? Wish you both continued success and sell lots more books! I bought the kindle copy. Love you both.

Sable

Dear Sable,

Thank you for your best wishes! Dr. Baer and I haven’t planned a sequel, but we would be interested in writing one.  I believe it would depend on how well sales go for Switching Time. We surely have enough information documented in order to do so.

Dr. Baer and I appreciate you believe Switching Time is a contribution to medical science. That is what we’ve hoped for.  It’s important to me that more becomes known about multiplicity. I can understand why it was hard for you to find a book on multiplicity that shed light on not only the patient’s suffering, but also how it was for the treating therapist. There aren’t many books that share what we’ve shared.

It really wasn’t difficult sharing my life with the world. But it was originally difficult to share my past with Dr. Baer.  It took years of building trust to do this.  I always worried I was too much for him to handle, and I feared he would give up on me.  We didn’t decide to write a book until all the alters were all integrated.  I never thought much of all the notes Dr. Baer took during our sessions. I admit, I often wondered what the heck he was writing down and knew he needed to do this in order to help me. I also helped Dr. Baer treat me by contributing thousands of pages of my own writing and my journals. As far as all that was written, it happened gradually. I wrote every day, over a period of eighteen years, and all was carefully documented.

I believe Dr. Baer chose to write Switching Time because our journey was fascinating: for both of us.  It was definitely exhausting for Dr. Baer to take care of me and for me to be in therapy for eighteen years.  But we did it!  We accomplished the full integration of seventeen alternate personalities.  How amazing is that!

Dr. Baer and I share a close respectful friendship, he continues to help me at times, however, most of the time I take care of myself the best that I can.

Thank you for your questions and for buying the Kindle version of Switching Time.

Karen

Comment by David on December 21, 2008 11:24 am

Dear Karen, I am writing this in response to your comment on my IMDb page.  You’ll know me there as Talking_of_Michelangelo.  As I can’t find a copy of Switching Time, I’ve placed an order for it.  I am a survivor of another type of abuse, and although I don’t have DID/MPD, I have been involved in running a support group for abuse survivors, many of whom did.  I’ve noticed above some concerns expressed that alters, once integrated, can return. Whilst I am not a qualified person, I have studied abuse and the various things it does, and I have never heard of alters being resurrected. I suspect therefore that this is not a problem. What does appear to occur, however, is that sometimes there may be alters hidden away that do not appear until much later. The difficult integration process may not succeed in integrating all alters, especially if they have not all been found. Thus if any symptoms reappear, it is very important to make an appointment with your therapist. I really applaud your attitude that alters and MPD are healing processes. I have the same view of post traumatic memories. I am in the early days of writing my own book on the subject of abuses by mental health professionals (I am a survivor of abuse by a debriefing counsellor) and so I wonder if it was nerve wracking for you to await the publication of Switching Time? Cheers, David

Dear David,

 Welcome, to our site! It’s nice to hear from you!  I’ve been reading your posts and I thought to myself you could write a book.  I enjoy reading what you have to say.

I am sorry you couldn’t find a copy of our book and had to order it.  Switching Time is available in most stores such as Barnes & Noble and Borders and can also be ordered on-line through Amazon.com and many other sites. I’m not sure as to your location, however, thank you for ordering it.  If you have any thoughts or questions, please share them here.

I am glad to hear you’re running a support group.  It’s very hard to find a safe place for those who suffer from abuse of any kind, especially for victims of child sexual abuse and dissociation.  Although multiplicity is one way to cope with horrific abuse, being a victim of abuse of any sort requires help and understanding.  Abuse is abuse. And all of us who have suffered feel similar inner pain.  I’m sorry to hear you have also suffered. I wish you well as you journey towards healing.

I, also, am not a qualified therapist, and like you, can only give my own opinion and not any advice.  It’s my hope that through my sharing people will find their own strength to move forward in their own journey.  We all learn from each other.  I agree with you, I don’t believe ex-alters can be resurrected.  Although it may be possible for another alter, who wasn’t integrated to surface, I highly doubt there’s anyone left within me.  I would be shocked, especially after eighteen years of intense therapy!  If I should ever feel “different,” I would definitely call my therapist.

I believe my alters were the best form of help I could’ve received. When as a child, left to figure out how to survive, how else could I have managed? I was fortunate my mind created my alters to protect me, but this way of coping didn’t support adult functioning.  As an adult my alters tried to help but instead caused chaos.  I continue to believe I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for “alter” help.  I’m sorry to hear that you were abused by your debriefing counselor; that is so sad.  I hope you find strength and continue your healing with another therapist that you can build trust with.

That’s great news that you are writing your own book!  I wish you the best!  Regarding waiting for Switching Time to be published, it may have been more nerve wracking for Dr. Baer, than me. For me, there was never a doubt it would happen. I had faith all would work out in due time. I always believed Switching Time was meant to be written and shared.  Dr. Baer and I were very lucky getting our book published.  Please don’t give up! You may receive some rejection letters, we did too, but in the end it’s all about persistence.

Thank you for your compliments! And thank you for sharing and writing in. My best wishes to you.

Karen

Comment by Carmen P. on December 14, 2008 5:17 am

Dear Karen,

Do you think it’s possible to create more alters after integration? I can’t know for sure but I was integrated ten years ago and believe that three alters returned this year. I’m not sure but beginning to not feel alone, if you know what I mean?. I know something’s going on and afraid to address it. What would you do if you were me? Isn’t this the ten year mark for you to? You are great and your story mirrors mine to some degree. What I really want to know is would you welcome new alters?

Carmen P.

Dear Carmen,

I’m not sure if it’s possible for me to create more alters ten years after integration. Not once have I ever felt them return.  I don’t believe the alters of my past can be resurrected. They are integrated within me and are a part of me. I don’t believe there’s any way to separate my ex-alters again from who I am today, at least this is what I believe.

I’m not a therapist and can’t give advice, but I believe you should share your concerns with a qualified therapist.  If I were you, I would address this issue immediately.

The thought of new alters being generated scares the heck out of me.  There is no room in my present life for it; I would fight against it.  Besides, all of my alters were created when I was a small child, when I didn’t have any other safe way of coping with the trauma I was experiencing.  As an adult, I’ve matured and can see the difference, and I wouldn’t tolerate and cope with abuse the same way I did.

Thank you for your interesting and thought provoking questions,

Karen

Comment by Lois on December 14, 2008 1:43 am

Karen,

It’s December and I am depressed. It’s Christmas and I am depressed. I am a multiple. a part of a person and six out of ten of us are depressed. not depressed. not depressed. depressed. depressed. depressed. depressed. depressed. not depressed. not depressed. In the book you claimed to be depressed a lot. How many of you suffered from depression? Any at the same time? All at the same time? What kind of drug creates relief when so many suffer? When it comes to depression who made the decision not to die? If one other was severely depressed how could another change their mind?

Lois

Dear Lois,

I’m sorry to hear you are feeling depressed. I can understand how stressful the holidays can be for some people and especially for someone who suffers from multiplicity as you do, and as I once did.  I felt very depressed at times, and some of my alters felt worse than others.  I can’t explain this and don’t really remember how many of my alters suffered from depression, and whether they suffered at the same time.  All I know is I felt depressed most of the time during my therapy.

I don’t believe any medication ever helped me with my depression.  I don’t remember whether I actually took the prescriptions given to me.  Most of the medicine bottles stayed full until I threw them away.  Maybe there was a medication that could’ve helped if I’d taken it, but I’ll never be sure of this.

I felt suicidal quite often, but to my knowledge I never actually attempted it.  I had the thoughts but never took action. I believe my alters, Holdon and Katherine, prevented it. Whenever I felt down and suicidal, I would call Dr. Baer.  I believe it was Dr. Baer’s guidance of my alters that kept me alive.  After we’d talked, my thoughts and feelings would settle down, reality would come back, and I’d understand where my suicidal thoughts came from.  Almost always, my thoughts came from my past and didn’t belong in the present.

Thank you for sharing,

Karen