Comment by Jeffrey T. K. on August 15, 2008 5:58 pm

To Karen Overhill,

I admire your spirit of survival. How is it that you and Doctor Richard Baer never appear anywhere? I checked the website for possible scheduled events and there are none. Will the two of you be planning any talks soon? Will there be any book events or book signings? Do the two you you do things together or apart? Where have the two of you traveled to since the book is out in the world? Interested in knowing if the both of you are real.

Jeffrey T. K.

Dear Jeffrey,

Thank you admiring my spirit to survive. Dr. Baer and I have appeared together on Good Morning America, in Newsweek magazine, and we traveled to Amsterdam and Antwerp where we were interviewed by ten journalists from different magazines and newspapers. We also have magazine articles written in several foreign countries, such as Great Britain’s and Italy’s Grazia magazine, Great Britain’s Woman’s Own, and more. Dr. Baer, alone, has appeared on Eye on Chicago, Fox News The Morning Show with Mike & Juliet, National Public Radio, and dozens of radio and magazine interviews, including the BBC and Chicago magazine.

The paperback version of Switching Time is coming out in the U.S. on September 9th, 2008, and there may be additional opportunities for personal appearances associated with that. We are hoping to travel more and share our journey with those who are interested and invite us.

And, yes, Jeffrey, Dr. Baer and I are real!

Thank you for asking,

Karen

Comment by Jennifer on August 15, 2008 9:50 pm

Dear Karen,

How amazing you are to share your story with the world! I picked up this book because it caught my attention. At first in a negative way when I read A doctors harrowing story? Second, why is this girl’s head chopped off? I thought to myself who “does this guy think he is” as if it was harrowing for the doctor and not for the patient. It seemed insulting. You were the one who suffered not him. But I bought it anyway.

After reading the entire book, my thoughts changed, it was harrowing for not only him but more so for you. It should’ve read your harrowing story instead of his. Both of you deserve an award. It’s an excellent book. The story was written in a way that you couldn’t stop reading it and when finished wanted to know more. That’s what all books should be about. I would like to see a second book written about you about what happened next. There has to be more.

There were certain parts that disturbed me and I have to know how you felt revealing the details of abuse in the book. It was so personally disturbing to read I assume you were affected. Were you forced into revealing these details? Would you say Dr. Baer enjoyed ratting you out in public for his own selfish purposes? I’m not trying to say he was wrong to write what he did but being a psychiatrist with confidential clauses, how could he? I admire your courage but am not so sure how I think about Dr. Baer.

I hope you are doing well and are living a happy life after all the hurts you had gone through.

Keep going,
Jennifer

Dear Jennifer,

Thank you for purchasing Switching Time and reading it. I know the cover was a bit off putting, but I believe that was the point, to draw attention to it. After it was explained to me, I understood the publicity reasons for it. Our story was a harrowing one, whether Dr. Baer’s or mine. Thank you for your thoughts on a second book. You’re right, there is much more to tell.

I feel Dr. Baer was sensitive in telling my story and never forced me into sharing anything I didn’t agree on. Of course, I didn’t altogether like the idea of sharing the details of the abuse I suffered, and I admit it was difficult to decide what part of my past abuse to share and what not to share. It was important for me to share some of the details so that the reader could “feel” how horrific was the abuse I suffered. How else could what happened to me have been explained? How else could the reader understand the necessity of my mind creating alters in order to survive? We wanted to make sure that through Switching Time this illness would be explained as thoroughly as possible. I believe we accomplished this.

I believe our story was meant to be told. Dr. Baer and I survived something rare, my extraordinary illness and a turbulent therapeutic relationship. How amazing is that!

Karen

Comment by Dennis on August 14, 2008 10:41 am

Karen,

Your answer wasn’t exactly satisfactory. I grew up in Chicago during the sixties and witnessed many perverted conversations by the elderly men in the neighborhood. They were all talk. I still find it unbelievable that men who talked perverted can actually abuse children. I would compare it to role play, not abuse. The men in Karen’s life probably tried to act tough with their friends, real abusers were silent back then. I also can’t see why Irena says children are the responsibility of all adults. If a child is not yours it’s no one’s business to say anything. I moved from Chicago 26 years ago and never been back and was not abused. If these men actually abused Karen why didn’t they kill her after they abused her?

Dennis

Dear Dennis,

Did you know, according to the State of Illinois Web site, there are 279 registered sex offenders in Chicago alone? Child molesters and abusers can live anywhere. That’s why it is the responsibilty of all adults to keep a close eye on something out of the ordinary and report any suspicions. As I asked before, what prevents those who talk in perverted ways not to act in secret? The men who abused me were a small group of insecure, sick men who somehow found each other and had no respect for women or children.

Although I am not a therapist, I believe my story has hit a nerve within you that has stirred up some ill feelings, possibly guilt, from witnessing the inappropriate conversations you overheard as a child. Please talk to a therapist about these thoughts.

Regarding your question on why my abusers didn’t kill me. Somehow, because of my early illnesses, they thought I wouldn’t survive childhood. That and I forced myself to be compliant and seemed not to remember. Otherwise, I believed they really would have killed me. Being a child of abuse, time and again, left me with no other choices. I thank God everyday for giving me the gift of dissociation, a coping mechanism beyond comprehension.

I hope you come to a better understanding of how child abuse can destroy a child’s spirit for life. The after-effects from abuse are disabling and life long. With help, the pain lessens but never totally disappears. I continue to do the best I can to keep moving forward.

Karen

Comment by Irena on August 13, 2008 11:07 am

Dear Karen,

I think a lot of people will deny the facts and refuse to believe that immature, disfunctional and sadistic adults permit themselves to hurt children (young girls) in mainstream American cities, hidden in mainstream American culture. Would Dennis and his like be so incredulous if your story came out of England? or Egypt? or India? or China even? Children are bought and sold (filmed, assaulted, abused) illegally in the modern world because there is a market for it and your father and friends just took what was there. You are spot on in your reply and I’m sure many women have felt angry at the question I refer to because it’s exactly the head in the sand attitude that allows this kind of horror to happen in the first place. America is a country of plenty, of anything goes, permissiveness and porn included, founded on a puritanical framework of Christian morality that often denies rather than faces the darkest aspects of human behavior. Dennis ought to think harder about those men and the “weirdness” of the 60’s because it is not ok to just dismiss it as “spirit of the times.” People get hurt, and you’re right, Karen, children are all adults’ responsibilities, not just their parents’, and in a way young people in our society belong to all of us.

Irena

Dear Irena,

Thank you for understanding and articulating what I, too, feel. I hope Dennis reads the responses left by you and Azkadelia. It saddens me to hear adults’ ignorance and disbelief about children who are abused; this is why they often have no one to listen to them. I believe it’s up to all adults to be aware and take notice of anything that appears suspicious. How different my life would’ve been if only one adult would’ve stepped in and helped me.

Thank you, again. Your comment will definitely make a difference.

Karen

Comment by Robin on August 12, 2008 2:48 am

Hello Karen,

I just finished reading your story. I found it to be fascinating! What a brilliant mind you have. Thank you for sharing it with us. I am a teacher and have suspected abuse in some of my students over the years. It is very difficult to prove this, though when you are working with young children. I am simply amazed at your ability to creat Elise who behaved as a “normal” student during the day. I am sure some of your former teachers would be very interested to know your story. Please consider sending a copy of your book to a former teacher of yours! I am also a mother of two young boys. I find it difficult to find time to be away from the boys to take care of things like occasional doctor appointments for myself. How were you able to find the time to delve into such extensive therapy with your two children at home? Your husband seemed to be angry and abusive, and your parents were obviously not fit to watch your children. Did you have other reliable friends/relatives available to help out with your kids? I am NOT criticizing you in the least bit-you needed and deserved the time to heal yourself. I am just very curious as to how you were able to swing it? As a final note, I admire your courage and strength and would be honored to meet you someday. If you are ever considering a public appearance, please post it to this website. Thank you, Karen. I wish you days of happiness and laughter!

Sincerely,
Robin

Dear Robin,

Thank you for all your kind words. I am glad you asked the questions you did. And if I happen to make an appearance, I will try to post it.

I honestly hadn’t thought about sending a copy of the book to the teachers who once taught me. Would they remember me? I can understand that being a teacher, how interesting it would be for you to know a child who survived what I have and how she did it. My former teachers could be well into their seventies or eighties, but I will consider sending them a copy. Thank you for your suggestion.

During my grade school years, when Elise took care of me during school hours, my teachers may have wondered about me. There were signs that most of my teachers, nuns, didn’t pay attention to. I had bruises no one asked about. I suffered severe headaches and spent lots of time in the nurse’s and principal’s office feeling ill. I often wondered why, especially after having my own children, no one took my symptoms seriously. I now understand the reason was—I dissociated. If I were a teacher back then, I definitely would’ve questioned everything that caused suspicion.

During my years in therapy, my children rarely knew when I had a doctor appointment. When they did, they knew I was seeing Dr. Baer to make me feel happy and well. Most of the time I scheduled my appointments during the school day, on the same day and time each week. I always made arrangements with a good friend, as backup, in case one or both of my children became ill or I couldn’t get back in time. Neither my mother nor my husband took care of my children during session times.

On the days I had a session, I’d come home exhausted and teary eyed. I’d try my best to calm myself, or I’d switch and another alter would come out to help. Therapy days turned into “pizza and movie night.” These were a wonderful distraction for me and my children that allowed me to hold myself together until after my children’s and husband’s bedtime. I dealt with it the best I could.

Thank you, again, for sharing and caring,

Karen

Comment by Beatrice on August 14, 2008 11:35 am

Dear Karen,

How wonderful it was to finish reading your story to find you are doing well and all. I admit at first I was appalled by what I read. I didn’t know if I could finish it so I put it away. In the middle of the night, two days later, I woke and had to know what happened next and read some more. What a ride reading this book. I am happy you survived and even happier to know there are doctors strong enough to handle tough cases like yours. I mean, Dr. Baer must have just as much strength as you have to survive along with you. Is he okay? Tell him Thank you from me. In the book Dr. Baer shared some of his past, too. I believe your meeting wasn’t an accident, but fate. I believe you both needed each other and that’s why your therapeutic relationship worked well. Congratulations on a journey well done.

Sincerely,
Beatrice, Wyoming

Dear Beatrice,

I am glad to hear you finished reading, Switching Time, especially since you were initially disturbed by my story. Other readers have felt the same. When I first shared this book with friends and family, I warned them my story could be hard to read, and if they chose to read it, I asked them to finish it. By finishing the book, they would have a complete understanding of all I’ve gone through and how I healed. I hoped my story would be inspiring to others.

Dr. Baer did need lots of strength to survive me. And I continue to believe he is much stronger than I am. I do realize I was difficult to treat, and I hope he knows how grateful I am. I, too, believe it was fate that brought us together. A journey like ours comes once in a lifetime. I believe it was meant to be.

I pray for Dr. Baer everyday and for us to continue to be a part of each other’s life. We have a close and respectful friendship, and I believe the relationship we continue to share is good. I’d like to believe he needed me in some way, too. Maybe just to accomplish one small thing, like saving the life of one woman?

Thank you for your thoughts and well wishes,

Karen

Comment by Azkadelia on August 10, 2008 8:26 pm

When there is “weirdness” or “perverted actions” there are problems. Masked or not, and as sad as it seems there are people in this world, such as Karen’s abusers, that are sick and don’t advertise their actions. Also, you said you can’t believe anything like this could happen in Chicago in the sixties? I find it hard to believe you honestly believe that statement. The sixties in Chicago weren’t all that great with radical movements and gang/mob activity, so is Karen’s experience really as shocking as you think?

Karen’s response to this question is spot on, you were extremely lucky to not be affected in a negative way by these people. Also, even though Karen and Dr. Baer have made the decision not to share the location where she grew up, it doesn’t matter. Chicago, Florida, Rhode Island or where ever, this type of thing happens everywhere and these types of people are everywhere.

Dear Azkadelia,

Sounds like Dennis’ question has upset you. I can understand why. I can tell how you felt. And I appreciate hearing from you. There are many who may not believe the possibility of abuse happening, even when it’s under their own eyes. The men who abused me didn’t look like monsters, nor did they show their weirdness in public. As a matter of fact, they were all employed in well paying jobs, and some were prominent neighborhood figures. All was kept hush-hush in those days. Yet, it happened, and no one dared talk about it.

Thank you for your thoughts and comments. I am sure many readers felt the same as you. I know I did.

Karen

Comment by Azkadelia on August 10, 2008 8:07 pm

Karen,

I’ve been reading your responses and am so glad there is someone who went through all that you have and are able to help people in return. I’ve also noticed that you are an amazing writer, are you going to write a book? Because I’m sure a lot of people would be interested in the patients point of view. It’s obvious that you’ve had a lot of input with the book because the way you write and the structure of the book are fairly similar, but it would be interesting to get in your head since we’ve been in Dr. Baer’s already.

Keep up the great responding and please keep writing because it really touches people and it helps more than I’m sure you know.

Azkadelia

Dear Azkadelia,

Thank you for all your compliments, comments, and concerns. I truly appreciate your thoughtfulness. I will continue to do my best to respond to those who ask questions and share their thoughts. This is what I hoped for—through my experiences to help others understand multiple personality disorder in a way that’s not been spoken of before..

All the Best,

Karen

Comment by Elizabeth5959 on August 10, 2008 1:57 am

Dear Karen,

You are an inspiration to me! It’s women like you who teach us through real life experiences to believe we can accomplish anything if we only try. While reading your story, my minimal traumas seemed so insignificant. I am a whiner. I’ve been whining to my therapist for months and he hasn’t complained once. Until I read your book I hadn’t realized I wasn’t getting anywhere. I wasn’t focusing on the problems I had. I knew what was wrong but was waiting for my therapist to ask me what was wrong and tell me what to do. Not only was this book helpful in understanding what therapy is, it helped me change my way of approaching my own journey. Thank you for sharing your life. It must’ve been hard to make this decision. I do have some questions.

1. During your treatment years did you ever suffer from nightmares or panic attacks?
2. Was Dr. Baer empathetic and helpful in understanding when you shared your dreams?
3. Did you ever wake in the middle of the night thinking you were under attack?
4. Do you have any suggestions I could use before bedtime to eliminate nightmares?

You are amazing! Dr. Baer is amazing! Please answer if you will. Thank you.

Elizabeth,
California

Dear Elizabeth,

Thank you for sharing. Don’t be so hard on yourself. I wasn’t the best patient at the start of therapy myself. Actually, I whined a lot, too. It’s all a part of building the therapeutic relationship. It’s hard to confide in someone who you haven’t established trust with. A few months aren’t that long. It took me much longer. It takes time to heal and to get into a routine. I believe your therapist didn’t complain because he already knew this.

I’m glad that my story has given you a better understanding of what therapy is. I believe you’ll approach therapy with more focus now that you recognized what you were doing. I’m not a therapist, but have to say, they rarely, if ever, tell you what to do. This is an illusion most people think of when they walk into a therapist’s office. It’s the patient’s job to bring up and talk about whatever comes to mind. After spending many months not talking, it finally dawned on me one day that he wasn’t saying anything—that he was there to listen and I was to there to talk.

During my therapy years I did suffer from nightmares and panic attacks. It was hard work bringing up all the past hurts that weighed me down. I was lucky Dr. Baer knew how to handle me during this time. As therapy continued, Dr. Baer’s care had been implanted in my thoughts and it was as if he calmed me down without being present. Dr. Baer has always been empathetic, and when I shared my dreams, he always gave me a better understanding about what they revealed about me.

Thank you for your “amazing” thoughts.

Karen

Comment by Annmarie on August 9, 2008 10:44 pm

Karen,

Did you lose your talent as an artist after your integration? I have DID and love the way I am and am afraid to integrate for fear of losing this part of who I am. What about other things your alters once did, do you remember their likes and dislikes and have you kept their talents? Thank you for answering all these questions.

Best wishes to you,

Annmarie

Dear Annmarie,

Please don’t be afraid to integrate for fear of losing the parts of you that were once alters. Living a fragmented life is too stressful. When each alter integrated within me, each merger diluted their individual talents, but as time went on, each alter that integrated gave me a sense of completeness that I never previously had. I am who I am because all of my alters are “me.” I don’t believe I lost anything: just put a few things aside, for now. I don’t believe I lost any of the alters’ individual talents. There are some things I haven’t tried yet, but my interest and desire to do so is there, just waiting for me. I continue to love art, music, traveling, and have many of the same likes and dislikes the alters had. I’ve become one woman with a variety of interests and talents.

Thank you for asking,

Karen