Comment by Jonathan Meltzer on September 18, 2008 3:14 pm

Karen,

This book and your story are incredible. Thank you so much for answering questions like this. I have a follow-up question. I’m sorry if you answered it somewhere else already. You had 2 children who grew up in a very interesting household. The book doesn’t spend much time describing your children’s lives as you went through 18 years of your therapy. How did the changes that you went through in combination with an abusive father impact them? How did their lives turn out? How were you able to help them cope? Have they read the book? Thanks.

Jonathan

Dear Jonathan,

Thank you for your compliments and for asking this question. Yes, I have two children who are grown and are doing their best to live their lives. After serving in the military, my son is home now working and trying to make his own way. My daughter is working and a full time college student studying Criminal Justice. Although they each have gone through more than most, I believe they have turned out well despite my illness and their fathers’s alcholism. Neither of my children has turned to alcohol or drugs and this has made me very happy. Of course, we all have our moments, but I believe it’s the same as with all children who to strive to be independent.

During my many years of therapy, my children didn’t notice much change beside the fact that I may have been tired and suffered from many headaches. My sessions were carefully placed during their school day. They only knew of Dr. Baer by name, that he took care of me, and was helping me to feel good after being sick. With help from my alters, I was involved in all of their activities, such as being a soccer mom, baseball mom, theatre, and more. I volunteered in every area of their lives so that they each would have the best mom I could be. This also was an important part of my healing. Being involved with them kept my spirits up. Besides a bit of stubborness, they are great kids.

My daughter has read the book and has told me she’s had no ill effects from her childhood, and she supports and respects my decision to share my story. She’s amazed that I protected them from this part of my life and has told me that I was a great mom. My son hasn’t read the book yet, and I told him to wait until he’s ready. And if he never reads it, that’s okay with me. It’s not an easy book to read, especially for a son. I talked with him about my past, and he understands that I was a victim of child sexual abuse and used dissociation to heal.

Thank you for caring about my children,

Karen

Comment by Morgan Faye on September 17, 2008 4:42 pm

Dear Karen Overhill and Richard Baer,

I’ve been in therapy for twelve years now and until I read your book I thought I was the only one who needed intensive therapy from past childhood abuse. I felt ashamed to tell anyone because no one would believe that it would take so long to get over what you and me and other children had experienced while being abused. I hated having to defend myself so I didn’t tell anyone. Is this why you didn’t tell many people?

Thank you for telling your story so that people like me won’t have to feel ashamed that we take a little longer than most to heal. I felt refreshed and good enough to continue my healing because I now know it will get better someday, like you did Karen. I have my own Doctor Baer, and he’s been a great therapist, too! I gave him my copy of your book after I finished reading it. He said it was written very well. I don’t have MPD but I do dissociate. I have less episodes since I am in therapy, every year I have less. There are good therapists out there and you and I found them. I wish all people be as lucky as we are.

Thanks to you, Karen and Richard Baer, I won’t give up,

Morgan Faye
Tennessee

Dear Morgan Faye,

Thank you for sharing your experiences of therapy. I can empathize with your reluctance to share what happened to you. During my early years in therapy, the first ten or so, I didn’t share with anyone except Dr. Baer. I, too, kept my sessions and journey secret. I’m not sure whether it was shame alone that kept me from sharing. I believe there were other reasons, like I didn’t want the attention, I feared my children could be in danger, or I thought no one could possibly believe what I would tell them.

Trust is very important to me, and I couldn’t trust anyone. I needed to build a foundation of trust with Dr.Baer first before I could begin to take a chance and trust others.

I am glad to hear you’ve found your own therapist who is there for you. I know how it feels to be in therapy for a long time. It takes time and patience to heal. I’m glad you’re not giving up, and having fewer dissociative episodes each year means your therapy is working for you. I wish you well.

Also, Thank you for sharing Switching Time with your therapist. There are good therapists out there and we were each lucky to find one.

Karen

Comment by Vanessa on September 17, 2008 2:14 pm

Hi Karen!

I have a critical personality. I judge everyone. Sometimes I think I hate everyone. When I picked up Switching Time to read at the airport when my flight was delayed because of Ike, I already preconceived the worst. I thought to myself, no way! Only there was something entertaining about someone switching time to cope. I thought this book should keep me busy for awhile. I bought the book and found myself trapped in your journey. It was unbelievable for sure, but no one could possibly make up or survive what you have survived without creating alternate ways to deal with your inner pain. How horrific you suffered. Well, I am a doubting Thomas and can’t criticize your story. I think this is a first for me, my first time, ever? I believe in you and can only say, you go girl! Spread your story and remember there are people like me who judge others, who can learn a lesson from you. I sure did.

Best,
Vanessa

Dear Vanessa,

I really appreciate your letter! I’m glad your chose to write and share your thoughts and doubts about multilple personality disorder. Your email is very important to me. It helps me not only to continue sharing, but also to feel respected for sharing my story. I do know there are those who don’t believe in MPD. I’ve accepted this. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

I didn’t chose to have MPD. It happened. I was fortunate to survive years of abuse through dissociation. I myself have also doubted other’s stories on this illness. But here I am, a survivor of MPD.

I invite any who have doubts to simply ask me any questions that cause them to disbelieve. I will answer their questions here. Maybe those who have doubts could then understand why my mind needed to create such a complicated coping mechanism in order to survive.

I have been blessed and believe there is a reason for everything. This is my time to heal, share, and make a difference by bringing awareness to an unbelievable, fascinating, and mysterious illness.

Thank you for reading my story, changing your thoughts, and believing in me.

Karen

Comment by Cathy on September 15, 2008 10:35 pm

Hi Karen!

I’m still reading the book (actually listening to it as book on CD) and finding it very, very interesting! I’m at the part where Katherine is about to be integrated. I AM SO SORRY THESE THINGS HAPPENED TO YOU! I’ve been wondering through this whole book if anyone was ever punished for what they did to you. The priest, the men who worked for your father and grandfather, the policeman, some of them have to still be alive. What happened to your friend Scott, and the little girl who lived near you, the one who was whose house you were at when the bad guys through the dead bird in the air? Why weren’t your brothers abused? I also wonder if your mother read the book. You are an amazing woman to make it through all you did. Thanks for reading my letter and taking the time to reply. Cathy

Dear Cathy,

Thank you for listening to the book on CD! I listened to parts of it, too, and the voice of James sent chills down my spine. I appreciate your concern and saying that you are sorry these things happened to me. I am, too. And I pray my story will bring awareness and help others to survive.

You asked some very good questions. As far as I know, all of the men who have abused me have died I believe they were all punished in their own way. The policeman committed suicide, two died from alcoholism related illnesses, and two from cancer. I only wish I would’ve had all the knowledge as a child I have today regarding sexual abuse. I’m sure things would’ve been different. They all would’ve been imprisoned for life. I would’ve told someone, and if that someone didn’t do anything to help me, I would’ve told someone else and someone else. I never knew that what was happening to me was considered child sexual abuse until my freshman year in high school health class. At fourteen, I thought all daughters were treated the same as I was. I pray no other child suffers from the same ignorance I once had known.

I’m not sure what happened to Scott, but I think about him from time to time. It’s my hope that he has moved on with his life. The girl, his sister, died at eighteen in an accident. My brothers were physically and mentally abused, but not sexually abused as I was. They are alive and doing their best to live their lives to the fullest. I believe my brothers weren’t abused because they were healthy boys, not sick as I was, and also because I always tried my best to protect them. Regarding my mother reading the book, no, she hasn’t, at least not to my knowledge. Since my father’s and grandfather’s deaths, I see no reason to share this part of my life with her. I have healed and have tried to accept the fact that she wasn’t there for me in the way I needed her to be.

I hope you find the rest of the book as interesting, and thank you,

Karen

Comment by Sophie on September 15, 2008 4:10 pm
Dear Karen,

Much success to you and Richard Baer! Thank you for answering my previous comment. Our book club members started picking up Switching Time but the book stores were already out, a few didn’t even have them out yet. This is an injustice to the book. We have some copies ordered and should be receiving them shortly. I did buy one and want to thank whoever added the discussion questions at the back of the book. I had volunteered to write up some questions for our club and this saved me a lot of guess work. I hope this book reaches college psychology classes and groups for discussion. I will write back after our next meeting to share our discussions and ask any questions we couldn’t answer for ourselves.

Thank you,
Sophie

Dear Sophie,

I’m sorry you weren’t able to pick up all the books you needed for your book club, but I’m glad you were able to order them and will have them in a few days! I don’t believe the book stores are trying to do an injustice to our book. It’s all about distribution and shelf space, and they only order a certain number of copies at a time. They order more as the book sells.

I will accept your compliment on behalf of the person at Random House who wrote the questions at the back of the book. I’m glad to hear they are helpful to you. It’s our hope that Switching Time will be discussed by many book clubs and psychology students. I believe my story can engage great discussions. To believe, or not to believe; it’s a mysterious illness!
I look forward to hearing from you, after your club’s discussion.

Karen

Comment by J on September 15, 2008 4:57 pm
Dear K,

I chose Hershel Walkers book over yours, while looking for a good book to read on DID. I was really disappointed in Hershels book that I went back, to return it, couldn’t, and bought Switching Time anyway. I felt Herschel wasn’t a DID suffer. I wanted truth about this illness. But, your story, now this is a story to remember! I would like to tell all readers to buy Switching Time for a true story and not waste their time on other books of nonsense.

Thanks,
J

Dear J,

Thank you for buying our book and believing in our true story. Dr. Baer and I worked very hard to share this truth.

I read Herschel Walker’s book, too, and felt it was more of a football story. But who am I to judge? It’s Herschel’s story and he wrote about what he experienced during his childhood. I wrote what I had experienced in mine. I can’t say he wasn’t a multiple, but in order to be a multiple, you have to have dissociative episodes. It’s a dissociative disorder, right? I don’t think he described that kind of experience. I never met Herschel but I would be interested in sitting down with him and sharing our experiences. It’s obvious Herschel felt hurt. I developed multiplicity from horrific abuse, but I didn’t see any of that as I read Herschel’s book. But I suppose no two cases are alike. We both felt hurt and both chose to write about it in order to help others. I wish Herschel well.

All my best,

Karen

Comment by Barb on September 15, 2008 3:51 pm
Hi Karen,

This is so great! You answering question not only about the book but what’s not in the book. I am curious like everyone else and have a strange question for you. What zodiac sign are you?

I am not one those strange people who only believe in the stars. I am only curious because you seem to draw and know how to reach everyone through your answers. I think you are multi-talented, so maybe you are a earth or water sign? If it’s possible can you find out what sign is Richard Baer?

Do you know that you are gifted more than the average bear?

Lot’s of luck to you and Richard, great book!

Barb

Dear Barb,

Thank you for your curiosity in knowing more about me and Dr. Baer. I do appreciate you feeling that I can reach people through my answers. This is important to me. However, this comes from my personal journey and the experiences I have had. I’m not sure about whether I’m a water or earth sign, but I’m a Gemini and Dr. Baer said he’s an Aquarius. What I do know for sure is we work well together.

Have a nice day, and thank you for sharing your enthusiasm regarding my answering all of the questions asked here.

Karen

Comment by Michael on September 12, 2008 6:40 pm
Hey Karen,

I just started reading your story and am almost near the end and couldn’t wait to share my first thoughts. The brain you have looks the same as anyone’s brain right? How did your brain work? I assume, like Einstein’s. It has me thinking that you had to use more parts of your brain to develop the alternate personalities and to keep them separate. If you used more of your brain to accomplish this, then what happened to your brain when you integrated? Did you lose much function and get depressed? Did parts of your brain die? When you die will you donate your brain to science? I think your brain must look different. Can you ask your doctor to answer this question if you can’t? I want to know how it is possible for a brain to work like yours and if you can teach people to use more parts of their brain like you do?

The way you used your brain is so fascinating. Please write more about it.

Michael

Dear Michael,

I appreciate your questions and feel there are reasons for the way my mind had created alternate personalities in order for me to survive the horrific abuse I had suffered as a child. My brain looks exactly the same as everyone’s brain, I’m sure, but just as each of us is unique and individual, no two brains work the same. I did not lose any brain function after integration. Dr. Baer described the process of integrating to me as if there were partitions between the separate personalities, and with integration, the partitions came down, one by one, and what was separate in the brain could then be shared. So nothing was really lost.

Donating my brain to science? I haven’t thought much about this, but I am an organ donor. I don’t think my brain would look any different than anyone else’s. I don’t think I could teach others how to use their brain the way I did. My way of coping with my childhood abuse was something beyond my control. Believe me, you would only become a multiple personality if you had to.

Thank you for all your interest and questions,

Karen

Comment by Tara on September 15, 2008 12:02 am
Karen,

Just curious? If I knew someone who said she knew you, would you acknowledge this person here in your q & a? This person in question claims to know you personally. I admire you, and said so. This person said you are real and her friend? We live in Rhode Island. Do you have a friend in Rhode Island?

I would also like to know more about what was not written in the book, like how you and your psychiatrist author communicated during years of therapy. Did he write all that you said down as he listened to you or did you write everything down for him before your appointments? I journal, did you? If you did, Who has access to all your journals? Can your journals be viewed online?

I read Switching Time three times and tried to analyze it. It’s impossibly great! What a puzzle! A true mind teaser. Great writing!

Tara

Dear Tara,

I’m not sure if I have a friend in Rhode Island. However, it’s possible. I have many friends; some I have lost contact with over the years. If she knows me she would know how to find me, if she wanted to.

There is definitely much more of my journey with Dr. Baer that hasn’t been published. I have always journaled. My journals and writings are in the care of Dr. Baer and myself. We haven’t published them for viewing on line; there’s just too much.

Dr. Baer and I communicated verbally and through my written words. Dr. Baer also took many notes during our sessions. Since I always wrote to him, much of what I shared with Dr. Baer was documented in my writings. For me, writing was an escape. I wrote to vent on paper what I could not always verbally share. Mailing these writings to Dr. Baer seemed to set me free. There was always too much to share during our limited session times. Besides, writing helped me let go of my pain and helped Dr. Baer understand me more.

Thank you for reading Switching Time and trying to analyze it. And, thank you, for your compliments, especially that Switching Time is a puzzle and a true mind teaser!

Karen

Comment by Susie on September 13, 2008 1:50 pm
Dear Karen,

What keeps you going and prevents you from ending your life? In one of your previous answers you mentioned that you still have these thoughts sometimes. I don’t mean to sound rude, but where do you see yourself in five years?

Susie

Dear Susie,

It’s true; I still have thoughts of ending my life at times. I know these “thoughts” are old responses to stress and I have no intention of acting on them. I try my best to overcome these thoughts by reaching out to someone close, praying, or diverting my attention to something pleasant, like losing myself in a good book. I will try most anything to break the pattern of these distressed thoughts when I have them. I believe each day brings something new, and although I still struggle some nights, I’ll continue to try my best to understand why I react this way and work through it. I am always happy when I awake each morning and know that I am alive and well, ready with a promise to myself to start a new day.

In five years, I hope my life continues to improve. I have faith and believe all will be well. Maybe I’ll be able to travel around the world, feel loved, be a grandmother, and enjoy my life in ways that I never thought possible. I do have dreams, and in my dreams, I live.

Karen