Comment by CSix on 16 Jul 2009 at 6:50 pm

I am in awe of your story! That you would be so willing to open up the depths of your soul to millions of people who hopefully read it! It has been a pivotal part of my healing, because I finally realized.. it wasn’t just me. I wasn’t alone in this illness. And it helped me to realize that I could be one, one day! If my parts indeed want to be fully integrated! You are in my prayers! Would love to connect with you at some point! Blessings!

Dear CSix,

Thank you!  Your compliments have touched me.  I’m glad to hear that in reading my story you felt you would be able to help yourself and move forward in your own journey.  Multiplicity is created from past abuse that was caused at the hands of abusers.  It’s never a child’s fault!  No, you are not alone in this illness; you were a victim of someone else’s warped perception of how a child should be dealt with.

Please don’t give up; integration is a necessary part of healing and becoming one.  I believe it’s impossible for a multiple to feel whole without integration.  I loved my alters, and that they were created to help me survive a horrific childhood, but as an adult my alters only caused heartbreak and chaos.

I hope that someday your alters will come around and integration can be possible for you, too.  That is the goal of healing, to become one self.  Please know that it takes time and patience.  Remember, it took many years for the alters to become who they are.  It takes time for them to heal and feel they can let go.  I always believed that once each alter accomplished what they meant to, they were ready to integrate within me.

I never lost one alter through integration.  Each of my alters will always be a part of me.  I am all of them.  The difference is, I am one woman, and my alters no longer control me.

Thank you for your blessing.

Karen