Comment by Dean on 02 Sep 2009 at 11:52 am

Karen,

Do people like you get judged a lot? I wonder ’cause I am schizophrenic and people judge me all the time. If I takes my meds I’m okay but when I’m feeling okay feel I don’t need my meds so I stop. Is it the same for mpd people? What kind of meds treat mpd? Why do people like me stop taking meds if they work. In your book you stopped your meds and did better. Why do people like me get worse off meds. We are the same mental illness are we not? I hear voices and people talking, you did to. What’s the difference?

Dean

Dear Dean,

Sometimes, yes, multiples are judged, in the same way as other disabled people can be judged.  It’s just a normal part of having an illness that is incomprehensible to most people. It’s why Dr. Baer and I are sharing my story.  When a multiple starts sharing some of what they have experienced, it’s hard for most to believe. When a multiple appears indifferent or temporarily spaced out, they may be seen as odd or not intelligent.

Schizophrenia is not the same as multiple personality disorder.  I am not a therapist and can’t give an exact medical definition, but to my knowledge a schizophrenic hears voices coming from the inside of their own head as if someone is talking to them from the outside, but there’s really no one there.  A multiple doesn’t hear voices in that way. A multiple hears conversation within herself.  Maybe the distinction is subtle, but it’s really a big difference.

I’m not sure why schizophrenics have the desire to stop their medication when they feel at their best, but I believe they don’t quite understand that the reason they feel good is because of the help their medication provides.  For a multiple, as I was, medications didn’t usually work.  At least they never worked for me.  Whenever a switch occurred while on medication, each alter’s response to that medication was different.  The only medication that helped me temporary was Xanax, which would lessen my anxiety temporarily.  It was like an aspirin. It helped my symptoms, but not what caused them. I rarely took any medication at all.

What I did during my therapy isn’t advisable.  I stopped my medication without telling Dr. Baer.  It worked out okay for me because my alters started to come out and were able to express themselves without having the medication interfere with their individuality and uniqueness.  But it’s not the same for schizophrenia.

Thank you for your challenging questions. I hope that my answer is sufficient.

Karen