Comment by Matt on 09 Sep 2009 at 10:59 pm

karen, what do you feel when you hear stories from people who claim to have the same illness like you did? isn’t it hard to believe their stories? can you spot someone faking it? how about the people who wrote books like herschel walker and cameron west? did you believe their stories? after reading your story for class we discussed it. more than a few students said they have mpd or knew someone with the illness. isn’t it wierd no one ever discussed it claimed to have it until someone discussed it in class? thank you for making me understand. let’s hope not too many copy cats like my classmates. matt

Dear Matt,

I don’t hear many stories of people who claim to have multiplicity, but I do admit that of the stories I’ve heard about, a few were certainly hard for me to believe.  I can pick up signs that most won’t.  In the beginning, I was ashamed to admit that I was a multiple. I felt people would laugh and not believe in me. I tried my best to keep my past trauma a secret.  Very carefully and very slowly I began sharing in the safe setting of Dr. Baer’s office.  I don’t believe a true multiple seeks outward attention.  Alters are created to help a victim cope with reality without drawing too much attention to oneself.

I can’t imagine why anyone would want to fake having such an illness. I tried my best to hide it. Being a multiple is not as exciting as the media leads people to believe. It’s sad and frightening not knowing where you’ve been, what you’ve done, and who you’ve talked to.  At the end of each day I always felt exhausted.

Regarding Cameron West and Herschel Walker, what struck me was there was no history of persistent abuse in their backgrounds.  That’s what I believe causes a person to be come a multiple, constant dissociation away from horrific abuse.  If you’re not being abused, why dissociate?  Dissociation is inconvenient and makes it hard to get through life.  A person doesn’t do it unless they have absolutely no other choice.

I’m glad to hear that your classmates discussed the illness, multiplicity. That’s exactly what Dr. Baer and I hoped for, people sharing their thoughts, ideas, and concerns about this incomprehensible illness. Knowledge is the key. I understand how interesting multiplicity can be and why some would want to claim to have it, or think they know of someone who has it.  I believe symptoms of multiplicity can also appear similar to other illnesses and may often be confused.  Only a qualified therapist can diagnose such an illness, and unfortunately, Dr. Baer tells me, they sometimes diagnose it too often.  I, too, hope that the illness is taken seriously.

Thank you for sharing that Switching Time helped you learn and understand more.

Karen