Here’s your answer to Kenneth on 27 Dec 2009 at 12:08 pm

Dear Karen,

Book was great! What an amazing work for you and Richard Baer to accomplish writing together. I love you guys. One question: In all the years of therapy and talking about what happened to you and finding your abuse out how did you know the difference between real and imaginary whilst trying to stay sane and work and live in reality?

Kenneth

Dear Kenneth,

Thank you for your compliments! Dr. Baer and I appreciate each one.

Regarding your question between imaginary and reality. Dr. Baer had always taught me to stay on the side of reality. I did not allow myself to imagine my past. It was there inside me waiting to be revealed. I stated the facts from memory and my therapy moved at a slow and steady pace based on that reality. There is no reason for make believe when healing oneself. If left to my imagination, I most certainly could not have healed. I would’ve pretended nothing ever happened to me, and that I was fine and happy. How would that have helped me? It wouldn’t have. Believe me, I could’ve thought of better ways to live, spend my money, and get attention.

Being honest and acknowledging my past was absolutely necessary to move forward. Imagination and lies keep one stuck in chaos. There is only one story based on the truth of my experience. I chose to carefully keep my therapy private, between me and Dr. Baer, and we developed a respectful therapeutic relationship based on trust. There was no reason to bring my horrific past into my workplace. The grueling details of my abuse were kept behind closed doors in the safety of Dr. Baer’s office. My alter’s eventually conformed to the therapeutic routine and we healed.

To survive, I needed to maintain a balance that was right for me. I believe Dr. Baer and I worked well together. We made a great team!

Thank you for your question.

Karen