Comment by Beth on August 9, 2008 9:24 pm

Karen,

Do you date or have you remarried? What does your friend or husband think about your past? I was abused myself and every time I shared this information with a man he literally stopped calling. One of my man friends actually told me once he knew I turned him off. How do share your past now that there’s an entire book about you?

Beth

Dear Beth,

No. I haven’t remarried, nor am I dating at present. Sharing my story with someone I choose to be intimate with will be a challenge for me. As for now, I am focusing more on myself and my own continued journey. I live a lonely life because I usually need to hide who I am. Not everyone would accept someone who once suffered from MPD/DID. For me, it’ll be important to be honest from the start because there’s a book out about me. I don’t wish to hurt anyone.

If I should meet someone of importance and wish to have an intimate connection, I will need to take the chance and tell him the truth about myself. If he should choose not to continue our relationship, then the relationship wasn’t meant to be. I have much faith and love to give, if given the chance. Maybe someday there’ll be a special man who can love me for being me, despite the victim I once was.

My ex-husband also was turned off when I revealed my past abuse. This broke my heart, and made me feel less of a woman. I believe if any man, as in your case, who says he is “turned off” when you share your story of abuse, then he never deserved your love in the first place. No man has the right to judge you. Please don’t allow any man to hurt you. Take care of yourself first.

Wishing you happiness,

Karen