Comment by Taylor on 08 Sep 2010 at 11:49 pm

Karen, I have to say, your one remarkable person! I just finished reading your story today and I find it the most amazing book I’ve ever read in my entire life. I was sad that I was finished with it.
I hate to hear the trouble that you suffered but I loved reading the happy ending! It was great! I’m happy to know your life is on track!
 I just want to let you know, God loves you and has loved you your whole entire life! Never forget!

Happy life and great blessings to you!!!

Love,

Taylor

Dear Taylor,

Thank you for the gentle reminder. I know God has always loved me. That’s why I am still here, alive and well, and encouraging hope through sharing my story. I promise not to forget.

Thank you for your blessings and compliments! I am working on writing the sequel to Switching Time. If all goes well, and I hope it will, a new book will compliment my story. I appreciate you sharing your interest in reading more. That thought has me smiling.

Karen

Comment by Carrie on 23 Aug 2010 at 6:03 pm

Hi Karen,

I wondered if your mom ever stepped out of denial to admit to her looking the other way. Did she ever apologize? I marvel at how your alters, Katherine and Holden, were like the parents you never had.

Love and blessings,

Carrie

Dear Carrie,

Yes, my mother briefly stepped out of her denial mode and “slipped” in many conversations, admitting that she was more aware of what happened than she ever led me to believe. A few times, in anger, she said that I deserved to be abused and have all those horrible things happen to me.

Still, I have forgiven her. Why? It is not my place to judge her. In letting go of my fear and anger towards my mother and her lack of affection, I was able to move forward and heal. My mind created my own inner world with perfect parents, Katherine and Holdon. I am grateful for that. I will no longer be kept a prisoner of my past. And, no, sadly, my mother has never apologized to me for not being there and preventing me from being hurt. I do not believe my mother ever will comprehend the magnitude of my suffering. Narcissistic? Maybe. Ignorance? Yes.

My mother was traumatized and abused, too. I am her witness. I believe my mother chose to ignore me rather than face the consequences of trying to protect me. During my childhood, my mother was beaten regularly by my father whenever she did not comply with his demands. My mother was forcefully controlled by my father, but compared to me, a child, she should have voiced her objections to stop my abusers. My mother let me down.

Thank you for your questions. I hope my answers help you to understand more about denial, being ignored and abused by those who should love you.

Karen

Comment by Gloria on 23 Aug 2010 at 7:33 am

Hi Karen!

Just found your book and read it in one day. I am so grateful you shared your story. I am a nurse in a psych unit and there is one patient that I could not understand. She kept changing so I searched for info and Switching Time provided me with great knowledge. I researched a few papers and read other books, but none like yours. It’s a great teaching tool. I suggest all doctors, nurses and anyone working in the med field read your story. I declare this book an asset. Karen, you and Dr. Baer provided the best description and treatment of D.I.D. I am grateful to experience the tour.

Amazing!

Gloria, RN

Dear Gloria,

Thank you for sharing! I am glad to hear that my story provides knowledge that in turn helps you help those who have suffered terribly and needed to dissociate in order to survive. It’s my hope that we can learn how to treat each other with respect. My journey was hard on both Dr. Baer and myself. Being a patient to a therapist who has never encountered someone like me can prove to be very frustrating at times. Sharing my story helps explain not only my illness, but what it is was like for a victim of sexual, physical, and mental abuse. Dissociation saved my life.

Dr. Baer and I appreciate your sharing my story with others in the medical field.

Wishing you all my best!

Karen

Comment by Edward on 23 Aug 2010 at 7:13 am

I have just been introduced to you so I am going to be cold and boldly direct. How far if at all were you set back by the mental health system itself? The problem of not really understanding the patient and not being equipped to direct the patient to the right place for treatment is monumental, And did being placed with others who had severe psychiatric disorders keep you from moving forward? Often this is only spoken about with workers but I see the effect on the client.

Edward

Dear Edward,

Sorry for the late answer. I don’t mind your question at all. I was fortunate to have found myself in the right hands. I may have slipped through the cracks and found inappropriate treatment early on, but luckily all that was meant to be happened. I went slow and never shared too much before starting my counseling sessions with Dr. Baer. I knew I was in trouble. But I never mentioned it at my workplace or in any relationships for fear of being locked up. As a matter of fact, I kept much secret from Dr. Baer until we were able to build rapport, and eventually, trust. It was difficult, but my system of survival was already in place long before I walked into Dr. Baer’s office. Remember, I spent my life before therapy in survival mode. My biggest fear about therapy was being misunderstood. I have heard many stories about how those who seek psychotherapy were shuffled around, from a psychiatrist for medicine, psychotherapist for therapy, social worker for help, and many staff members with the end result of rarely receiving the treatment necessary for their healing journey.

During the two hospitalizations I found myself in my own world. I didn’t fit into the mold of a psych patient, yet I felt safe from the outside world. My misconceptions included false beliefs such as that the medical staff would beat me. I didn’t know what to expect. But as a multiple, I adapted. I made many friends and became the person each patient needed me to be. Therefore, my hospitalizations were not helpful for me. Instead of healing, I became more of an enabler. Instead of working on my own issues, I served and listened to everyone else. I did not receive proper therapy for my multiplicity while hospitalized. I don’t believe anyone knew what to do with me. Once I actually checked out of the hospital and had a friend drive me to Dr. Baer’s office. Dr. Baer did not treat me during my first hospitalization.

I don’t believe multiples need hospitalization or group therapy. In my experience either would cause continued chaos without the needed room for growth and moving forward. My therapy with Dr. Baer worked for me because I received one-on-one care without interference. I believe my therapy was successful because of less, not more.

Thank you for your thought provoking questions.

Karen

Comment by Dave on 19 Aug 2010 at 2:29 pm

I don’t know if you take messages here, as I’m sure you get ALL kinds of messages from the pointless to the inappropriate, but here’s hoping you do!!
I just finished reading The Book on Monday. Wow. What an amazing, tragic, incredible, sad, happy, and inspirational life you’ve lived. Based on what I read, I think you are a remarkable and amazing person for so many reasons. I’m a fan. And the fact that you shared a link on Facebook to my absolute favorite band, U2, now I know you have taste, too! I’m hopeful that you are in a good place now and I’m also hopeful that you write back.

Sincerely,

Facebook Friend Number 2,346, Dave

Dear Dave,

How sweet it was to receive your message! I am touched that you are a fan of mine. I never heard that before! I appreciate you sharing from your heart.

Thank you for sharing all your thoughts and for your compliments! I am being my best self. And hope to continue on…

Looking forward to getting to know you on Facebook!

Wishing you a wonderful day!

Karen

Comment by Monica on 18 Aug 2010 at 4:45 am

Karen,

I read A Life in Pieces or Switching Time a long time ago, but I still can’t put it down! I tell everyone about it and they are all eager to read it.
What did it feel like when you ‘lost time’ ?
I hope your feeling better now.

Lots of love from Monica

Dear Monica,

Thank you for your compliments and for sharing my story with your friends! That means so much to me.

Losing time felt as if someone had pushed a pause button and I would “go away” for a while, and then come back without any awareness of having been gone. I would only realize I lost time by looking at a clock or finding myself somewhere different than where I assumed I should be. It was a bit frightening coming out of a lost time pause, because during those few moments I’d feel weak and confused. But then I would re-adjust to my current whereabouts and continue on.

A second read… I will take that as a compliment, too!  Thank you!

Karen

Comment by Mark on 18 Aug 2010 at 1:28 am

Hi Karen,

I read your story and felt hate, love, faith, joy, sorrow and horror all at the same time. What an amazing write! Thank you for sharing your story. I like that you mention many times that your desire is to encourage hope through sharing your story. I believe in you. Have you thought of writing a second book? With or without Richard Baer? I am in my mid fifties and enjoy well written books. Switching Time took me on a ride. I’ll never forget you, Karen Overhill!

Light and love.

Mark

Dear Mark,

Thank you for your kind and helpful support. I truly appreciate hearing from you. Yes, I am in the process of writing my sequel. I believe there is more to share and it continues to be my hope to shed more light on this once incomprehensible illness. It takes time to heal. All my life is a journey.

Wishing you all my best!

Karen

Comment by Patricia in Rhode Island on 17 Aug 2010 at 6:35 pm

I feel horrible today. I felt horrible for months actually. I read your book a few years ago and decided to read it again. I knew what I was getting into but also know that after reading your book the first time I felt strong, encouraged and knew if you could make it so could I. Here you are, still here, still alive, still using your voice to help others and here I am asking you for prayers. I have no insurance to go to a therapist. I know the abuse I suffered as a child is creeping back into my thoughts and causing me to feel dysfunctional. I know you understand me. So all I ask is for prayers of strength, just something so that I don’t worry about my faith, my job, my life, people who once hurt me, people who piss me off, everything and all of the above. Do you have a prayer that you can share with me? A prayer that might of helped you a few times? I will respect you if you say no. Thank you.

Pat

Dear Patricia,

Thank you for sharing and for your heart felt thoughts! I hear you. A very dear friend of mine gave me the prayer below.  I found it helpful and I hope you do, too!

Wishing you all my best!

Karen

Prayer…For One Burdened with Worry:

Father, teach me that, as your child, worry has no place in my life. I know that it helps nothing. I know that worry overcomes no difficulty. Often in the past, Lord, I have come to you with heavy heart and burdened life, and you have answered my prayers and graciously lifted the burden from me. Yet, I still refuse to leave my burdens with you. Always I gather them up, those heavy bundles of fears and anxieties, and shoulder them again. Help me, dear Lord, to overcome these useless thoughts and lift from me once again all anxieties and apprehensions. Help me to live just one day at a time with a confident trust in your tender mercy and love. May my heart know your promise that I rest only as I rest in you. I thank you for your love for me and for your help. Amen

Comment by Cal on 12 Aug 2010 at 3:51 pm

Karen,

Did you ever overcome all your fears of clowns, polka dots, gray painted things? I was curious to when that happened and what thoughts you have now after not being abused anymore? Another two questions please. Do people still tend to take advantage of you? Do you make mistakes and regret them?

Thank you for helping me overcome my fears by sharing your overwhelming story.

Cal

Dear Cal,

Yes, I’ve overcome my fears of clowns, polka dots, and the color gray. As a matter of fact, I own a gray car. Though I do admit I continue not to like clowns. I assume it’s because their painted faces don’t allow me to tell what they’re thinking. My survival depended on “reading” people and their body language. Clowns no longer draw fear in me; I just can’t read them.

My thoughts on abuse continue in my effort to help others. Abuse is abuse. Healing is a life-long journey. I never think of being or not being abused. Once abused there will always be a trigger that comes up now and then, reminding me of what happened to me. The difference is now I am able to recognize it, acknowledge that it happened to me, and put it aside where it belongs–in my past.

It’s very easy for me to be taken advantage of if I’m not careful. I would love to trust all those I come into contact with, but I’ve had to learn the hard way. I can’t say I regret the relationships that have let me down, but it’s hard to imagine someone wanting to hurt me after all these years of abuse. By allowing myself a moment to reflect, step back, breathe, and try again, helps me to forgive myself and those who have betrayed me. I never hold a grudge.

Thank you for your questions and compliments,

Karen